Truth as Elixir

 

Elixir Word today:  Elixir

 

The inevitability of truth causes me to continuously confront people who deny my feeling reality, my emotional health depends upon my willingness to be true to myself as I attempt to do so without hurting anothers’ feelings, although my own feelings are certainly more important to me then theirs, its that truth, that elixir that keeps me moving forward. Anything else is codependent.

Expectations are essentially premeditated resentments, so limiting my false expectations to the sureness of things that “will truly be” is a way to stay out of the way of harmful expectations. I cannot afford excess resentments, I am still dealing with some that are lifelong or reoccuring, generally having to do with past unresolved relationships.

Truth with people in my life means that I am able to say, “Wait, that is not correct, you do not get to ignore my reality”  and have expectations that’re ok, for instance, someone says, “Oh no you shouldn’t think that”  I call bullshit. I get to think and feel exactly how I feel without your need for me to think or feel a way that makes you feel more comfortable.  Your need for me to cheer up is your problem. Yours.

This is when truth is an elixir in my life. I do not have to hide behind a veil of your needs, I am free to be myself. Intimacy is very important to me and there can be NO intimacy in the presence of fakeness. For real intimacy to occur, for it to be a real elixir to life, I have to be myself at all times, the truest form of me that I can muster, I need to be me, express me, without fear, it is not easy. And the second part of real intimacy is for YOU to be the real you. For you to teach me who you are, not hide behind a mask of false feelings, fake realities and phony persona, no, in actuality real intimacy depends on you being your real self. And finally the third part of true intimacy is for WE, the two of us, in any relationship, romantic, friendly, whatever, it is for we to be who we really are together, the real us. That can only emerge when we are our real selves to begin with, in the moment, in the now.

Hence, intimacy, is that lovely elixir of life and truth exists when I am me, and you are you, and we are we together.

 

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Author: Jillymaui - My Van Life Adventures

A hopeful solo RVan life traveling gal, enjoy the last decades of my life, I love wildlife, genealogy, SF Giants baseball, swimming, painting, guitar playing, singing, sightseeing, and writing in my Tiny Tiki Hale.

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